Taken from alt.jokes newsgroup,  cant believe people can be this dumb

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)

Jeremy Paxman:  What is another name for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’?
Contestant:  Homosexuals..
Jeremy Paxman:  No. They’re regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)

Jamie Theakston:  Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant:  Geography isn’t my strong point.
Jamie Theakston:  There’s a clue in the title.
Contestant:  Leicester

BBC NORFOLK

Stewart White:  Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant:  I don’t know.
Stewart White:  I’ll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant:  Arm
Stewart White:  Correct. And if you’re not weak, you’re…?
Contestant:  Strong.
Stewart White:  Correct – and what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name?
Contestant:  Louis
Stewart White:  Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant:  Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )

Alex Trelinski:  What is the capital of Italy ?
Contestant:  France .
Trelinski:  France is another country. Try again.
Contestant:  Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski:  Wrong, sorry, let’s try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant:  Sorry, I don’t know.
Trelinski:  Just guess a country then.
Contestant:  Paris ..

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)

Anne Robinson:  Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: – Prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant:  The Conservative Party.

BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )

DJ Mark:  For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis:  I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE

Bamber Gascoyne:  What was Gandhi’s first name?
Contestant:  Goosey?

GWR FM ( Bristol )

Presenter:  What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant:  I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO? MANCHESTER )

Phil:   What’s 11 squared?
Contestant:  I don’t know.
Phil:  I’ll give you a clue. It’s two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant:  Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY

Richard:  Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
Contestant:  Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND JUDY

Richard:  On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant:  Er. … ….
Richard:  He makes bread . .
Contestant:  Er .. ……..
Richard:  He makes cakes . .
Contestant:  Kipling Street ?

LINCS FM PHONE-IN

Presenter:  Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant:  Barcelona ..
Presenter:  I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant:  I’m sorry, I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain …

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)

Question:  What is the world’s largest continent?
Contestant:  The Pacific..

ROCK FM ( PRESTON )

Presenter:  Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.
Contestant:  Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)

Steve Le Fevre:  What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
Contestant:  Magna Carta?

JAMES O’BRIEN SHOW (LBC)

James O’Brien:  How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant:  Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth .. ER. ER … Three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL )

Chris Searle:  In which European country is Mount Etna ?
Caller:  Japan .
Chris Searle:  I did say which European country, so in case you didn’t hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller:  Er ………… Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )

Paul Wappat:  How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (long pause):  Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM’S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)

Daryl Denham:  In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant:  Holland ?
Daryl Denham:  Try the next letter of the alphabet..
Contestant:  Iceland ? Ireland ?
Daryl Denham: (helpfully)  It’s a bad line Did you say Israel ?
Contestant:  No.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)

Phil Wood:  What ‘K’ could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant:  Er… ….. …
Phil Wood:  It’s got two syllables . . . Kor .
Contestant:  Blimey?
Phil Wood:  Ha ha ha ha, no The past participle of run . .
Contestant:  (Silence)
Phil Wood:  OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . ..
Contestant:  Walked?

THE VAULT

Melanie Sykes:  What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant:  Nostalgia.

LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)

Presenter:  What religion was Guy Fawkes?
Contestant:  Jewish.
Presenter:  That’s close enough.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)

Wright:  Johnny Weissmuller died on this day.. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?
Contestant:  Jesus.